[ Reverb10: Day 10 : Wisdom ]

Day 10. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

I got a bit stuck on this prompt: I'm not wise and I don't make decisions, so how can I write about that? There's no one defining moment I can think of this year. Nothing really changed for me. The things that I have done, have come from slow realisations, not decisions.

........

3<-------------------------------------------------------------------SNIP! [Later]
I wrote most of this post, and then I went for a walk, thinking I would finish it later. As I walked though, I realised that it just wouldn't do. What I wrote was hollow; it didn't feel right. I hadn't answered the question truthfully. And I realised why that is - I haven't been wise at all this year. I'm not able to answer the question. I've let my fears hold me back. I've listened to the negative voice. I've told myself that I can't do things, that I don't deserve things. I've made bad decisions that I regretted. I've procrastinated so much it's made it impossible for me to achieve my yearly goals. I let go all of the gains I'd made in 2009 and forgot all of the vows I'd made to myself at the end of that year.

In other words, I've been going backwards.

That's not very wise, is it?

I'm sorry that I can't write a more satisfying piece for this prompt. But there you have it. There's no point in regretting the past. You can only move forwards. So I make a decision now to do just that. I feels like it will be a wise decision - I just need to be resolute and don't waver and don't fall back into the old habits.

*sighs*

I feel like I've made this decision many times before, but it's vital to keep making it, as and when required. There may well be times when I'm stuck, not moving at all, but that's okay as long as I'm looking ahead, to 2011 and beyond.